When I was young, being told to wait any amount of time was an eternity. How long until dinner? 10 minutes. 10 MINUTES?! How could my mother expect me to go without food for that long? A week might as well be a decade, and next year may never come. Life move so slowly as a child.
My grandmother always said that time would speed up as I got older, but I never really believed her. It was just one of those grandmothery things that she would say. It wasn't until last year that her prophecy came true. 2012 was the fastest year I have ever experienced. It skipped from New Years, to our engagement party in July, to Christmas, then slid easily into 2013. I remember all the events of last year (and believe me, there were many) but it all seems condensed, as if the whole year took place over a matter of weeks.
Many brides (or expectant mothers, or college students, or anyone else waiting for anything exciting) tend to wish time away. Daily count downs until the big event. Not me. I am so excited to have a wedding and be married, but I want to be sure I soak up ever single minute of the un-wed stage of my life that will soon be coming to a close. I want to take pictures, to write notes, to document this end of an era in such a way that I could look back to see, feel, and taste what the last few months of my unmarried life were like.
Sadly, I can't. I feel time slipping through my fingers like water and I have no way to stop it. No way to bottle my current feelings of anxiety, elation, joy, and freedom.
After the wedding I will forever forward be attached to another human. I will never again be able to make a big decision without consulting The Lion Man to make sure we are on the same page. That's fine, and the way it should be, but it will be an adjustment.
While searching for ceremony readings, I cam across a beautiful poem containing a line that read "Today I join my freedom to yours." Exactly. Marriage is not an end to freedom, it is adjusting your view of what freedom means. Once married, one can no longer exercise their freedom at the expense of their partner's. The reckless, at times dangerous, freedom of youth is gone and is to be replaced with mindful freedom. Freedom paired with thought.
Marriage wont be the end of freedom, just a different kind of freedom. As we race head long toward our wedding day, I am learning this fact, and loving it. My single years may be dripping through my fingers, but they are being replaced with my future, OUR future, and I could not be more excited to embrace that change. Until then, I am still going to try to capture every bit of the life I have now.
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This Saturday is my bridal shower! I chose an Alice in Wonderland theme and my fabulous and crafty Future Sis and her mother are planning the party. Everyone will be dressed in Wonderland-esque clothing, lots of champagne tea, and some fun games! I'll give you all the details next Wedding Wednesday!
Keep it Fancy,
Jett
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